Fasting under 43 degrees but mostly under AC

I decided to fast this year on my days off while I'm on ground to experience the meaning of the Ramadan.
I always found the reasons behind fasting very beautiful and for the first time today when I friend asked me to eat something I felt very proud to say I was fasting. My fasting is still not perfect, I admit, but for the first time I'm not that bad... and I'm happy. Of course having a friend fasting as well, for the first time like me and for the same reasons, is also motivating because we cook together for us and break the fast together and celebrate. In a near future we will celebrate the Iftar in some good restaurant around and truely feel the spirit of Ramadan. And I'm happy!

It's not just about the words you said
It's not just about your voice that is beautiful for me
It's not just the way you used to blink your eyes to me
It's the way I love you and the way my soul is connected with yours.
I can not change. You are part of me.


:)

Sometimes I get surprised with my own strenght...

God is definitely fantastic and gave me such a power within that I really don't know from where it comes. The way I reborn from the ashes is surprising for me and I give all the rights to God/Universe who made me like this... this strenght comes from above for sure and from its LOVE.
Yesterday I was completely broken but I do believe I'm such a blessed person that the Universe sent me the right friends, and so a friend of mine managed to calm me down. It wasn't easy but she gave me the support I needed at that moment and I re-borned from the ashes.

Yesterday I read an article about love myths and love reality. I wandered about the subject for a while and I made my own conclusions. I took what was written and digested every word of it. I completely agreed in some aspects which were written and from those 5 myths I particularly selected the next ones:

1 - Love is not enough.

 We all heard this one and we can love or hate this quote but here it is what I realized: love is not enough but is in fact the big part of the thing! Of course we have to love the person is next to us but by saying this I'm not avoiding or hiding aspects that I might not like that much in that person. I am just accepting totally that person because I DO love her/him as a soul. Love is in fact the most important thing but there is also the compatibility. Since I was young I used to say, without realizing in fact what I was saying at that time, that love is not enough. You have to share the same lifestyle/way of thinking with the other person. Of course you can disagree about your favourite colour or some aspects of life, but, as long as you accept each other and RESPECT each others' opinion things can definitely work! Sharing the some principles is definitely important for me.

2 - If it's true love we will never fight.

Of course you will! This is one of the biggest myths ever. Even when we find our soulmate, we will fight. People need to comunicate, we are a social being and we will agree and disagree with people because we are all unique and nobody is like us. Plus, sometimes we are tired and the other will take something we say in a wrong way. It happens and it can happen! It is so normal to fight from time to time that is pointless to explore more this point here. The important message to keep is that one argument is not going to ruin your love story or all the love is going to fade away. In fact we can learn a LOT by having an argument with someone. We can learn about the other, how to listen more carefully and how to deal with that person (love partner or family or friends), being tolerant and patient... with love.

So many books and so little time....

After 10 days of deserved holidays I came back to Qatar, willing to read books like crazy, take care of myself and find a new me. Reading books, meditate and stay with myself and GOD is my number 1 priority as the Holy month is starting on 19th July.

Ramadan Kareem!

Written on 3rd July:

God is extremely wonderful. When I least deserve love that's when we send me HIS gifts and put people around me giving me love unconditionally.
Another day, while working, I must admit that my mood wasn't the best. I was very quiet, I wasn't saying anything or something nice to my colleagues, as I usually do. I wasn't even joking or making fun of something to make others happy, as I usually do.
I was with my thoughts and I was feeling blue and despite my mood, the thing is, my colleagues were somehow nice, somehow in little details they were expressing love... telling me to sit down and rest a bit, as I was working a lot or, at this time, making me laugh!
I felt good and I realized how good God is! I think we all deserve love, in good days and bad days and I experienced it... we deserve love anytime and we should receive it without regret!

Sometimes we share 4 days with people who end up turning like a family to us... & I feel so blessed and HAPPY about it... this is a true bliss of life!

- "He is my skin, my life, my heart, my soul..."

- "Well, if he is everywhere, then it's love..."

I did it!

30 min in the treadmill today and some stretching! I'm naturally skinny but it doesn't necessarily mean  that I'm fit and lately I have seen myself tired just for doing nothing. So, you can imagine how fit I am....
So, today was THE DAY! I said to myself it was time to face the gym - yes, I absolutely avoid/ignore/hate gym!! - but the treadmill it's better because it also helps my legs' circulation.
30 min in the treadmill, maybe 2 minutes in the bike and stretching!

A good way to start... being fit! (Let's see if it lasts.... ahahahah)

Dreams can change everyday. Yesterday I could have had a dream and today, after what I experienced I can have another dream. I do believe that new dreams are always welcome. That's what keeps us going on and on and seek for more.
Yesterday my dreams were different. Today, one of those dreams was acomplished - I moved country exactly one year ago. I remember all my fears, insecurities... everything! Today, I don't fear the same (do I? Well, at least I don't fear to live in Doha anymore eheheh). So, I made it... and it wasn't that bad! Actually, I'm very proud of myself, well, I really should!! What expected me was huge! I faced so many things in 1 year that I had to manage somehow... maybe this is the process of getting a real adult!
I'm facing my fears and my darkness (oh my, please, go away, give me a break pleeeease!!), I'm loosing insecurities from the past, I'm learning about myself and what I really want. My definition of love, friendship is totally different now. Today, I'm more pure I should say. There is no masks, there is no need to please anyone anymore, there is just ME, purely.
After seeing so many things in the company I work, on board and around the world (well, everywhere) shaped me for sure! I saw people using each other just for pleasure (feelings, where are the feelings, emotions, love??), I saw people being childish, nasty, arrogant, mean, stupidity in almost all kind of ways (maybe that's more, we never know...).
Once we get to see all of these things it's impossible to not get different. I do believe I did not turn out being a bitch but turn out to be more human and appreciate life differently as I changed and give more importance to what is real and from the HEART!
So, what others called crazyness, others courage... happened! For me, I just followed my intuition. I didn't know what to expect (at all!!), I said to myself over and over again "let's try" and I felt I had to come! It has been an incredible experience full of up's and down's and  I'm grateful!
Today, I have good friends here, people whom I love and love me back, I feel comfortable and know how do manage my daily life within this country (and its crazy crazy definitions of life). What makes a place is without any doubt the people you know, your friends!
I'm very happy for having such good (REAL) friends here... in this desert called Doha!
I know... you might be wondering: What about her family and friend from her country?
Those never leave my heart! My family and my REAL friends who live in my country (very few at the moment but the REAL ones!!) I miss everyday and I got used to miss them everyday... as well as my LOVE! 

Another passion of mine...

Is absolutely amazing the way I surprise and discover myself everyday. Today, I discovered (or re-discovered) I like the stationery near my house. Some places in Doha make me feel absolutely connected with myself: Virgin Megastore (at Villagio Mall which unfortunatelly is closed due the fire it suffered killing people - I'm still shocked I must say), Jarir Bookshop and now Stationery Shop. 

Some places fascinate me or I feel myself enchanted in those places, where I can relax, take my time to explore books, music and check all the simple details of life in a new book, a new pen or post-its - my lovely post-its! Yes, life is absolutely wonderful, we just need to STOP and FEEL!

Is it easy? Not everytime or not at the first sight (our brain is most of the time busy being negative or feeding an ego), but believe me, it worth it! It worth to feel umconfortable, set the ego free, set yourself actually free to enjoy the simple things of life! Even if it starts with a simple post-it that you are going to use to read books and learn arabic - something you were wishing for soooo long!

 

Do like the butterfly... spread your beauty by flying away.

Respect yourself, love all your cells and heart.

Go, live and love.

Photo by my lenses and heart, taken in Indonesia :)

Flying can bring interesting, emotional, sad and happy situations into our daily routine

Receiving a kiss from an old lady full of love where I could feel an autentic way of gratitude, honesty, humanity filled my heart another day, as well as, an emotional life story who someone shared with me.

Sometimes we don't know the impact we have in other's lives doing something so small and so big at the same time. These two situations made me realized that I really do things for the others without expecting nothing in return. I just do it with an open heart because, fortunatelly, my parents and life taught me how to be human in the chaos and to put myself in other's shoes. My heart was immerse in love when the lady thank me with a gentle kiss and my heart felt emotional (and the tears almost rolled in my face) when someone shared his story with me and appreciated what I did.

Flying is a tiring life that most of us don't even realize it. The most positive part is to touch other's hearts and feel the human kind in such small things of life. More than destinations, funny or horrible situations, rudeness and kindness, what I keep for myself are the values, the humanity and the simple treasures of life. Like LOVE. True Love.

This a public announcement:

If you want to test your nerves with sexual harassment you must come to Doha!

There are days that is almost impossible. It is too much that you end up like me saying a lot of bad words in your language or just like today looking directly to the hunter and say "seriously?" (translation: are you really trying to hunt me instead of driving?????)

The importance of being... in the present!

Every time I get sick I always analize my life to see where I was making any mistake. I believe that when we get sick is because we were running too fast or paying less attention to ourselves.

So, it was with me. Of course eating a salad that it turns out to be spoiled was one of the reasons to get sick but everytime this happens I allow my body, mind and soul to relax to recover fully... and I analize how much attention I was paying to myself or not. The brightest part of being sick is to re-connect with yourself. There's no way to escape it. You may not even recognize it but you re-connect with yourself automatically because you have to give attention to yourself. You feel the pain, all the umconfortable symptoms etc and you have to slow down and say to yourself "ok, let's heal, let's stop and recover. I give myself all the time to recover. I'm here for you (body)". When you say so, or when I say so, I release part of my anxiety of being good within 2 minutes. When I stop and say "ok, I admit I was rushing too much lately, I'm sorry. Let's take time to heal and recover" actually I'm saying "you (body) worth all the time of the world. You are the physical part of me who supports me and gives me everything I need to experience the physical world. You are a temple and so I give you the attention because I love you, you are perfect because you are Universe's Creation".

So, yes, I was sick yesterday and one of my friends came to help me. The pain on my body was too much to even stand up. So, we spoke, she made me company and cooked for me something light and plain to eat. Today I'm much much better. I believe I surrounded myself by love and because I rested a lot it made me recover faster. Though, I'm still introducing food slowly into my body. Everything is plain and light for now. And some minutes ago I was listening music and feeling grateful for everything in my life. For a healthy body recovering from food poisoning, for the will of reconnecting with myself more than ever and for the beautiful and blessed moments to come!