There is nothing like home and home is where your heart is

I'm feeling at home because I'm finding my heart. When you set your mind FREE from all controlling thoughts it means that you set yourself free from all your useless thoughts, all negative energy and you are ready/free to feel your heart beating.

I left my mind somewhere, I'm leaving part of me that doesn't make sense today.

I'm breathing and not controlling anything at all taking all the Peace that just the Universe can give to you...

Breathing... And loving more than ever, everyone. Even if just for seconds.

Living/breathing this message from the Universe:

One day you will see that NO ONE can cut YOUR WINGS.

And you will feel, maybe for the first time, true happiness.

~

I lived for some time of my life trying to ignore what I am inside. Today, I'm not afraid to say what I want, what I like, what I feel. We need to live everyday fully.

Be unique

Be YOURSELF

Without fears 'cause Universe takes care of YOU when you allow yourself to be true with your ESSENCE.

Listen to yourself.

TRUST in Universe and in YOUR HEART.

They always know the right way/the answer :)

So, as a declaration to the world:

Yes, I'll follow my dreams and my heart. I just need courage!

If you know where I can get some please let me know!

Another one filling me...


"Many nights we've prayed
With no proof anyone could hear
In our hearts a hopeful song
We barely understood

Now we are not afraid
Although we know there's much to fear
We were moving mountains long
Before we knew we could

There can be miracles, when you believe
Though hope is frail, it's hard to kill
Who knows what miracles you can achieve
When you believe, somehow you will
You will when you believe

In this time of fear
When prayers so often prove(s) in vain
Hope seems like the summer birds
Too swiftly flown away

Yet now I'm standing here
My heart's so full I can't explain
Seeking faith and speaking words
I never thought I'd say

There can be miracles, when you believe
Though hope is frail, it's hard to kill
Who knows what miracles you can achieve
When you believe, somehow you will
You will when you believe

They don't always happen when you ask
And it's easy to give in to your fears
But when you're blinded by your pain
Can't see your way straight throught the rain
A small but still resilient voice
Says hope is very near

There can be miracles
When you believe
Though hope is frail
It's hard to kill
Who knows what miracles,you can achieve
When you believe, somehow you will

somehow you will
You will when you believe

You will when you believe
Just believe...

Just believe
You will when you believe"

It's all about HOPE, FAITH & THE UNIVERSE

Strenght

We received pearls everyday, pearls made by wisdom from a stranger, a beloved friend or just from nature. They are all from Universe who is trying to tell you something... we just need to receive it.

Today I received a music which says:

When you get caught in the rain

(...)

With no where to run

(...)

That you just can't find your way home

You can get there alone

It's okay, what you say is

I can make it through the rain, I can stand up once again on my own

(...)

Don't be afraid, there's nothing you can't face

And they should tell you, you'll never pull through

Don't hesitate, stand tall and say

I can make it through the rain, I can stand up once again on my own

(...)

Food for your soul.

Food for MY SOUL when I most need IT :)

Oh, I miss my trips!

I know that I said "from now on I'm going to save money and I'll be very quiet doing my thesis this Summer and studying for my last subject" but I still miss my trips! I like to observe, explore new cultures and breath new fragrances (and/or pollution). Being outside allows me to be completely inside and I like to test myself in the most strange and magic places.

I want to feel my Indian part in India where my sparkling essence can find itself.

I want to be part of a beloved country, where I can test myself over and over again.

I want to throw away old thoughts and prejudgements that I may have and which are so traditional in all cultures...because we all judge without noticing it sometimes.



I want to push myself more and more... to live totally and FREE.



I want to leave my old person behind, the thoughts and energies because they no longer can survive inside me because I'm new.


I'm trying to reborn in order to find myself and be totally free and happy...
I want to smile not just in my cells but also with my liver!!



ps: I still miss my trips! And I never thought I would say this, but: I miss Paris... :)

Preparing the next East Festival 2011 in Lisbon, Portugal

And the process started/starts... sending emails, organizing schedule, teachers, themes... everything!

Plus, organizing another event in the capital.

A bussiness woman, that's what I feel I am from times to times.

Brrrr... I'm dreaming...

... and leaving my ego in order to taste my sweetness essence/soul and LOVE's GOD inside my heart.

Om Shanti

Picture from BK

Once I read

Don't be sad because some friends are going...

Be happy because new friends are coming...

This is the gift of the Universe

* I'm learning to be detached and everytime I feel that I realized that I love much more that I did previously...

I don't love you because you said Hi, I love you (all) with all my heart just because you exist...

a pure love without conditions. As Love's GOD.

I realized that I'm turning a new me

We are always changing and I've realized that I'm also changing in some aspects.

So, let's see:

- I'd always enjoyed all seasons, from spring to winter, I never complained about it but lately I'm wishing a long summer or a long spring and a short winter just to force me to stay at home resting. I always said winter is good to sleep, be under the blankets and watch movies!

Oh, and drink hot chocolate nhamiiii!

- I'm listening myself more than I used to and we all should do that. Sometimes... I still forget me but something always reminds me that, so I can stop and pay attention to what it's important.

- I'm saying to myself "this is not you, this is not your life. This is not good for you. Drop it and take another thoughts - pure and positive"

- I get furious sometimes when someone doesn't understand what is saying to me/is saying things without meaning when I don't need to hear those things (we all need a break ok? Especially when we are sick and just need to sleep to recover our energy).

What I usually do is look within and say "ok, I can be sad and furious sometimes, there's nothing wrong about it. Now, stop thinking about others and think about YOU because no one is going to do things for you or be happy for you." and by saying this all the furious turned into tenderness.

- I have feeling fluctuations within me.

Lot of doubts, lot of questions - asked by my ego and sometimes, maybe, by myself.

Ego and consciousness can't cohabit in the same frequency. If you consider that your ego is speaking instaed of your essence then consciousness is present and ego starts to disappear (yes!). How I've detect that? Well, my ego is very destructive, doesn't say anything to make me happy, on the contrary but I'm trying to do what they teach in BK - give a present to your mind, speak like a mother speaks to a child with tenderness, love and patience. Instaed of saying to a (useless) thought "go away" give food to your mind and think about positive things that you like.

- Having faith. You just can feel it inside your heart and lately I was too much inside my head being less spiritual. Goal to achieve: listen to myself, listen to my heart because he is the only one who knows, and truly knows what is best for me. If you live inside your heart you can see GOD. If you live inside your head, well, you just see things through your head... put your head/mind and heart working together. Nothing has to be opposite.

- Stop thinking about useless things and start living... totally, fully, happily.

UPS, I did it again...

My body said "Hum, I'm tired" and I had pain all over my body.

My soul/heart said "Maybe you should take one day off" and my mind asked "can we make an agreement? Half day off?" - but I forgot it!!

Does a nap counts?

Now, I'm sick. Couldn't leave my bed in the morning because my body was full of pain.

I knew it... I've forgotten to take vitamins!

I'm not a wonder-woman, I'm human too!

I feel that since Friday night I entered in some kind of roller coaster. I hadn't time for anything I'm just moving from one place to another, being present in difficult moments and working hard...

Friday night after my dance class I almost flew to perform in another place. I'm feeling more and more that the stage is my world. In a specific occasion I asked for the audience's clapping to feel the music with me. First attempt. Nothing. Second attempt. Almost there. Ok...
Third attempt: I was clear enough and by gestures I said "I'm not hearing anything". Now, they understood! :) Oh, now it's really a show! They were following me, clapping and enjoying the music with me... Yes. All that a dancer wants... Having the audience enjoying the show with her :)
It was a night with up's and down's. Very interested people enjoying my show, a man making sounds that I didn't enjoy at all and people saying to my boss how much they appreciated my performance. Wow, I was surprised but it's not going to make me a star. I always want to grow more, be more, do more! Although it was good to see my work recognized.

Saturday night: ohhh... what a night! My car died, it was a huge problem to park it, hurry in the theater to get everything done on time. Some thieves opened my car but fortunately they didn't steal anything, just messed everything... and the car suddenly was working good. Ohhh....

Sunday morning: news that changed my plans for today.
Being present for friends that needed me, my support, my hug. Meeting friends that needed a hug, meeting friends that needed a smile. I'm turning an chameleon or I'm just growing up. Don't know. Don't want to know. I'm just trying to live one day at a time and trying to return to my meditations every morning to get God's energy and LOVE.

Day by day finding my balance... and working hard as I'm going to study now, at 11.40pm (Thanks God we have coffee for these moments).

Love and happiness.

Key words

Patient. True. Honest. Authentic.

Myself. Light. Essence. Soul. Generous.

Acceptation.

Do everything according to your self, be yourself every second of your day

Be light. Be YOU.

Feeling good

'because you can be sad with some friendship circumstances but life will always show you how things can be better when you detach from it.

So, despite loosing some friends lately (they have the right to choose what is best for them - always! We all have...) life is showing me that new friends are coming, not better friends but friends which energy is on the same frequency... people that want to plant a seed everyday to make a stronger friendship. And by that I mean, maybe I'm not loosing anything, maybe I'm receiving better feelings, better energies, better moods... maybe, more honest friends (without saying goodbye for those who are just sleeping and don't wake up to solve things with me when I tried to do so... the best person I can be for them is sending love and happiness, always).

Celebrating life mood today!

Today I saw how a human being can be really bad, poor and evil...

I was just driving in a very normal day when the car in front of me throw away a little cat to the street. The poor kitty barely could walk and I almost had a heart attack. I immediately stopped my car and jumped out of it to find the poor cat (while everybody was staring at me and asking themselves who is this crazy woman or what is this woman doing?!?!?!?).

My heart was beating to fast and I was so furious to see that happened (and happens?!?!?!?) in XXI century... couldn't believe in my eyes... how evil can a person be to do so!!

Unfortunately I couldn't find the cat... the poor little cat. I'm still shocked...

Feeling baladi

Listening to music over and over again in order to choose which music should I dance next week. Hmmm... feeling soooo baladi and diving into my essence to reborn.


Listening outside the rain falling... and feeling lazy, very lazy whilst my heart is in another place, far from here.

Picture from Brahma Kumaris to inspire us...

I would like to keep inside of me 24h/day all the good things, good energy and all love that we receive from our days... and I'll do it! As the weather I'm also feeling unstable, feeling that something is wrong inside me, feeling my ego trying to survive no matter what (and by ego I mean that voice that keeps going on, inside your head worrying you about things that you just don't need now, in your life, in your soul... breaking you inner peace...!!).

I've already experienced days of rain where I was happy happy happy but lately... too much things to manage inside me, too much rain on my window (Someone IS really upset in the sky), too much to manage, that's all! This weather is putting me sad.... I'm trying to forget that I spent all my Summer studying, yes, I'm really trying to forget that because after all I'm not done with university yet. This will be my last year, thesis included and I'm soooooo anxious about it that sometimes it's hard to deal with all anxiety.

I need time to read, to relax and look within to start again my meditations. At least with these sad feelings that I'm feeling I learnt that I forgot me (again)... damn! I said "later I will do some meditation to balance myself" and "later" was always for tomorrow, and tomorrow... oh, I've really learnt now. So, I wope up 2 days at 6am to listen to some meditations because I needed to start doing something but it turns out it's not working, so, I'm trying to figure out the best meditation to do when you brain/mind is still too much active/negative and you want to calm down a bit...
And I really need to feel that I love myself! That's what's killing me right now... but I have no idea if it's suppose to "think" - "yes, I love myself" OR just feel that I really like me... that's hard. I'll try to get the 2nd one because it makes more sense to me, but I don't know... oh, I definitely need time to breathe and relax.

Quando Quando Quando

(When, When, When)

Flying with this.....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aLNTJd-gziQ

My inner answer: when we are ready...

Lalalalalala mood

My "lalalallala mood" (singing stupidly) has just one reason: the joy of being healthily alive! Ahhhh so much dreams to achieve, so much plans to change, do and change again because life always show us new (our own) paths.

The idea of taking a plane and change my world inside makes me truely happy! Today I just want to change for better.

Ohhhh I'm dreaming... awake... for a new place where I hope I can call home :)

In love with the following pictures:

My last show was almost superb!

That night I decided to be free, I threw away all my useless thoughts and I allowed myself to be ME;

I enjoyed every second and I definitely had so much fun.

I felt the audience staring at me and enjoying the moment as much as I did.

I immersed into the music, I enjoyed myself and I definitely flew away... directly to everybody's heart.

I felt deeply in my heart that I reached something amazing that night and I could feel interaction, communication and respect!

Ooooohhhhh, I'm flying.

I'm in love with everything.

Flyiiiiing high

It tastes good, divine, sacred... feeling love inside my heart, feeling that after all I'm not a rock in my essence.

Things that I still have to do:

- prepare myself to fly on stage later (and it takes pedicure, manicure, hair, make up, costumes, jewellery...) and meditate (I wish I could have time to do that sometimes...) to say thanks Universe for all blessings and also for the strenght and courage that I needed to start solving all issues that were making me sad...

- pack all my stuff (costumes and all that I know that I'll need later (water, books, dried fruits, mp3 player...)

- Reorganize my week: so much to do and I'm just one...

*Feeding my soul*

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8LfUvi1bof8&feature=channel

Today it's going to be (or I suppose it will be) a long long post so take a deep breath....

Damn, conclusions till NOW:

- We are alone and some friends aren't really friends. To explain everything in this sentence...

I don't personally believe that we are all alone, I believe that, no matter what you believe (God, Universe, Energy, etc...) we are always protect by a Supreme Energy that Loves US as we truely are (yeah, I said TRUELY!). But, some friends aren't really really friends... and as a friend told me once "the friends that you have now, maybe part of them won't to be part of your life in the next 10 years. I can say it now to you because it was what happened with me...". She's right, she's totally right and I never have doubts about that.

Definition of friends - another interesting quote to consider in my daily life. What's your definition of friend? Thank God I can say that I have some true friends, those that carry me when I most need them, those that don't judge me and are with me with their pure hearts sharing their lives and accepting my choices (even the most different ones).

Fortunately I know by heart their names and I don't complain about them as I shouldn't complain about some friends that don't show me their hearts... yes, I'm reaching the point where I give without giving to much and don't expect some people to be truely friends. I'm reaching the point "Auch, you hurt me, take the knife and leave please".

I think most people don't realize how a simple gesture makes the difference (do they??).

As a friend I don't expect you to tell me EVERYTHING about your life or about your things but when it's about doing something together like going to a place, taking an event together etc and when you speak about that with the other person and suddenly she is going with other people, everything is arranged and she says "yes, my ticket is booked" as if you never talked about it... Damn, it hurts a little. I'm not sure what means to be a friend anymore and it seems that I'm trying to not figure it out anymore. No worries. (I will try!)

Thank GOD, I like to be alone and I never feel that I'm actually alone. HE is with me and I trust myself and I feel safe about ME.

Fortunately, and because life is amazing, in the meantime people that I just know are showing their hearts, being honest and helping me when I didn't ask for anything (I didn't ask anything to my other friend as well). They are being themselves... just it!

Conclusion: All that I ask in all kind of relationships is honesty. Pure hearts and true love without too much external information is a gift and I'm realizing it now. When I allow myself to just feel my essence, my true and sparkling heart, that we all have inside, I reach the point where I'm totally honest and ME. And I'm not intend to be arrogant with this sentence.

I just think/FEEL that sometimes we take to much external information (including me) and we can't manage all to select what is good from what is less good.

- Once again: Reorganizing my LIFE! I think I'll always do that and perhaps that's good. It may say that I'm not comfortable about anything and it makes me seek for more/better ways.

Although lately I feel that I need time for me. I really do. And today I spoke with my sister and I was (just) trying to talk about one issue and we ended up talking about another issue that is done for me and there's nothing left to say... oh, but she always like to say the same... damn, I freaked out I can't support more of this subject... I was suppose to be calm, I really woke up in a very good mood, I sang for me, I saw the sun shinning and felt blessed by nature but talking about the same or being the target of the day for some people shouldn't take me out of my mood as it did.

- My path is not your path!

Everybody has a different path and sometimes it's difficult to another person to deal with *your path*. What can I say? I face this one sometimes, maybe I'll face more in the future... just because I'm really looking for my path *outside, abroad, etc* because I feel and I truely believe that my path is direction X...

- Feeling tired. Feeling dizzy. Feeling lost.

Because we all have difficult days sometimes where we just want to lay down and take a deep breath.

Today I received too much noise from outside, so much that I just want to lay down, take a deep breath and meditate. And asking for too much, where I go: fall asleep in someone's arms (*his*)

- Leaving my comfortable room for a couple of hours to work/dance with my (new) girls!

Let's dance with our hearts... and fly fly fly :)