No one said it was going to be easy

When you take your life and take control of it as a Queen/King you may find obstacles although you stay there because you know/you feel that it's your path.

The warrior in me is saying: Go away, go away, live your life, live your dream... I deeply feel inside that I have so much strenght that I could even share it with others but I'm not using it not even for me (?!?!)... or it's just my wrong perception?!
It's so interesting that I'm not afraid about living my harder dream because I know GOD/Universe protect who is brave although I don't do anything about it (or by another words, I'm trying to be calm and rational - I hate this word! I can't use just my mind, I just can't. It doesn't work for me being just in my head and I hate when I'm too rational, I feel I'm loosing so much from life - but the real thing is, now, I want to definitely explode because I'm tired - God knows why I'm so tired... I'm tired of wasting energy doing something that I know that doesn't work for me. It doesn't make me happy, it doesn't make me smile, it doesn't give me the challenges that I need to grow!)

You see, I have to much thirsty for life. I desire with all my guts to grow, to do better, to give more, to feel more... everything more! and my thirsty doesn't kill me, it gives me life instaed.

I'm fire and I don't allow anyone to kill me but I kill myself. I'm my best friend and my enemy.

I have darkness and I have brightness, as we all have.

I know what it's not working. In this case, university stuff it's not working anymore.

I can say I've reborn after my depression. Oh, one thing that is definitely good after that is knowing me better than ever and feeling my essence and finding so many good things that makes life worth.

But for me, university.... bah! I'm still playing the game... studying etc etc, yes, or I'm tough or I'm really silly ahahahah (I admire my sense of humour in my darkness!)

No one said it was going to be easy. I found my problems within, I found what is killing me on my daily basis and setting me away from happiness but no one said it was going to be easy to solve all the problems...

So, one day at a time! Taking time and air to breathe... thinking with mind (if necessary) and HEART, because life without heart doesn't mean anything.

And because I truely believe in Universe, I'm doing my part. I'm helping myself and trying to open my heart more and more. May the Universe send us all bright light to guide our paths, even the hardest ones.

Because, I know that I can ignore some things, I can be silly by asking myself everything that I see (and even what I don't see!) but I can't ask the Universe things I've felt deeply inside.

So, for those who think I'm crazy or I don't live in the real world (this one is good!) I just have an answer: The Universe ISN'T silly, HE knows what HE does and MY HEART knows what's inside and I can't contest it. We all just need to listen to ourselves/our hearts! Did I mention that it isn't easy? Yes, sometimes it isn't at all... that's why I'm trying to colour my essence with courage every day!

So, I wish we all GOD's LOVE, HIS bright light, courage and strenght to change what it's not working for us - we usually deeply know that - but we got stuck somewhere thinking we can't change because... (Why we can't? Who said that?!)

My next challenge is doing exactly the opposite if someone decided to say to me "you can't"... Let's see if I can't.... who's the Queen/King of my/your life after all? (My Sagittarius is screaming today! Like that!!)