Yesterday the sky got richer. 

My grandpa's will was heard and he joined the sky to rest in peace.

As he always said, nobody stays on earth forever and one day he would celebrate the passage of life along with Saint Peter by having some drinks in heaven - he would say this laughing out loud, accepting the natural order of things.

Even though I'm absolutely sure he is in a better place now I would like to honor him today.

* In this moment I choose the silence. I wanted everybody to comfort me, the ones near and the ones far away that I don't even remember, to repeat all over again "he is ok, he is fine, everything will be alright", but the truth is, I already know it. So, I simply decided to be in silence to grief, to accept and to ask God to nurture me and ease my pain and my family and let it go.
My grandpa was known for his good mood despite all odds. And like that he will stay.
Thank you grandpa.

People usually tell us that the one meant for you will always approve everything you do. 

So we keep on falling down and getting up expecting someone who will absolutely agree in everything we say, think and do. What people don't know is that such sentence is a limiting belief which sets us to fail.

I believe that everything is possible in Love (based on real love and not ego - where someone has to correspond to your own expectations). I also believe that in a relationship both parts have to surrender somehow and get a balance. Probably it annoys you something your love one does and most probably you do something that makes him/her uncomfortable too! 

Getting a balance is more than essential, is vital for the relationship. 

Believe that you two can enter a safety zone without compromising your own identity! 

Maybe you can avoid doing something if it is not important to you and maybe the other part can do the same. 

I have been trying to understand this dynamic in relationships and particularly till which line you can actually drop something for the relationship's health. Some will say: you should not drop anything for anyone whilst others will offer you a caring and loving approach with which I agree: nothing is black and white. If you are committed to make it work with your soulmate/partner there will always be something you two disagree and don't like about each other's habits. As long as you are not letting go of something that is important to you, as long as the thing you are giving up is something which won't compromise your own soul then maybe you should give it a try, with love!

Above all, your heart will always know the answers. We just need to silent the mind/ego.

My mind has been assaulted too often like a boiling pot of soup...

So I gave myself permission to make this soup a warm and caring one, full of ideas/conclusions... and I recommend you to grab a tea :)

People will tell you how a MAN should be. They will, actually, sell you the idea that they know how men are or should be, because they have experienced X, Y and Z, so they are credited to say such and that's the universal truth.

The truth is: everything is relative. I believe men are human beings above all and like us, women, they have their flaws, insecurities, and perhaps dramas...

I refused to buy "ideas, projects, plans" based on other's experiences (even though it gets difficult sometimes). It would be easier to simply categorize men or women, explaining that if he/she does A, B or C therefore it means X, Y or Z.

I choose to see people, men or women, as human beings. We all carry our limiting believes, backgrounds, traumas, energies, culture, religion, past, etc so all of us are different. 

If I do not compare myself with anyone in terms of experience and soul why should I, then, compare others?

Like that, it makes me go beyond what society has been telling to all of us for the past years, centuries, etc. It's by giving space to go within our hearts that we understand that each one of us is singular. It cannot be compared. It cannot be replaced. It cannot be reproduced.
Every experience, every situation is singular (with few similarities sometimes, I admit) and it contains the unique lessons that those people need to assimilate/understand in a heart-level and therefore cannot be the same.

One month ago...

My little cat angel got her wings and left the physical word. Her loss was nothing like easy. It is still not easy and turned out to be a turning point in my life. 

My pets will always be family and she was not an exclusion of this rule. She was/is always close to my heart as my companion, friend, baby, angel. 

Maybe a friend of mine is right: maybe we will never know how to deal with death, perhaps, we will just know how to deal with the physical absence of the other and get used to it.

I decided, during this mourning period, to transform her absence in gratitude and hope. I could have collapsed (even though I did so...) and felt like I was being punished, however, I sat down and cried the pain. I decided to make her departure lighter.

I decided to emanate Gratitude for all the amazing moments she gave me and shared together; for melting my heart and made me laugh... how can a small pet have so much love to give and add so much to people's lives?

I believe, pets are little angels sent by God to make us company, be unconditional love and, in some cases or even all, to guide us. They are the direct link to the Divine where there's just love.

Life is a gift.

As I write this entry in honor of my Tinker Bell, tears come down my eyes. I accept it as part of life and my emotional being and as life goes on and my commitment to live in gratitude of my sweetest kitty I know one day the tears, eventually, will only give place to smiles.

Maybe the concept of death has became clear: maybe there's no death but rather a passage of forms where the soul leaves a physical form but never dies.

I am sure my princess is well and happy, surrounded by love; 

I choose to live in Gratitude.

I love you my angel.

Thank you for everything...

Thank you God. It was a honor to pet her :)

Guess,who mentioned to be back and disappeared for almost 30 days more? 

ME, I confess. 

Although, the reason of my absence was due the big loss of my beautiful adorable kitty (and another cat we used to feed and pet).

Those who know me can imagine how this painful event has affected me, in so many ways, but as everything in life it has its own meaning too.

I will write, very soon, about my heart healing once the time permits (I'm working a lot the last couple of days).

I admit I missed my blog and my space as part of my expression and I would like to review/(re)welcome all of you once again here.

You may prepare a tea or a coffee. Hopefully I will make regular posts from now on!

Love and light,

Filipa

GUESS WHAT:

I'M BACK!!!! :)

Good morning everyone (if anyone is out there!)!

Time has passed so quickly and intensely that my blog has been empty of new posts/thoughts!
A lot of water has passed under the bridge and new ideas arise...
I should admit that MY 3 years of Middle East (congratulations to me!!!!) didn't go unnoticed! In the contrary, my brain and my soul have been trying to sum up my experiences, my ups and downs of such a ride!! I can't forget that today, I'm diferent, maybe stronger, wiser and who knows a little bit more mature in certain subjects than before!

So my question is: what have you learnt in these 3 years? My answer is a LOT. I still can't measure how much but I can only say it is a lot.

Have you stopped to ask yourself as well how much have you learnt from some experience/(s) in your life?

I know, I know... more than 1 month has passed since I posted something.

I could start with my usual explanations why I have been absent for so long but I am sure we all know it. Believe me I have missed posting my thoughts into the blogosphere! and how many brainstorms I have had!

Have I mentioned how many things have happened this year, in 2013, and how much I have grow? I m sure we all feel the same, somehow.

As I believe I do have to pratice more gratitude towards life in general I decided to write about 2013 today, since December is the last month of 2013, and because they say we change with our birthday's and not with New Year's Eve and my birthday is coming, let's pratice gratitude and welcome a new charpter of my life! So, sit back, relax and enjoy the gratitude journal as I encourage you to do the same.

_______________________*

Affff, let me breathe first. There are so many things I am grateful for in my life and in 2013.

It has been a difficult and transforming year for sure with a lot of decisions and feelings inside myself. Doubts, fears, decisions, tears, smiles, lautgher... everything has been here! The road have been difficult lately, I should say but I'm grateful for the obstacules, for the experiences, for the love and for the happiness as well. Everything has made me grow, even though sometimes I can't see it clearly or shortly as I wished.

I am grateful for my family, my friends and my pets - I do appreciate all of them, their well being, health and protection.

I am grateful for being healthy and having a warm place where to sleep at night and be on my own. I do need my personal space specially at night where I can pray, meditate and be on my own with God.

I am grateful for not giving up of anything I believe is for me. This is my weakest point where I can start crying... I have been tested in so many ways along the road (especially because I like to control events, what can happen, what can't happen and most of the time (all the time) it's a waste of time). Those tests I believe life has giving me always give 2 choices, either I'd give up and be rational and someone I am not and not happy or I'd continue following what I believe is for me, for my soul, even though with difficulties and hold on to the faith that everything will come in the right time.

I chose the second. It ressonates with my heart. Is all of who I am.

I have been giving baby leaps of faith, following my heart desires and what I believe God has sent to me. It hasn't been easy, I had doubts, I doubted myself sometimes in the path but I realized that it's part of the process of getting up and getting stronger in our hearts and faith. Sometimes we fall down and everything is apart so that everything will get together one day in the right time, at its own time. Our mission will only be "waiting", which is the most difficult for me. Though I believe within my whole being that when the right time comes everything will be even more amazing that what you have ever dreamed.

So be patient and be grateful. I AM!

I am grateful for travelling all over the world. It is exhausting to do it in a daily basis but gave such an experience: human, social, cultural etc that I could never had if I didn't decide to leave my country 2 years and 6 months ago! I am absolutely grateful for doing so. I am grateful for the courage I had to leave everything behind. Today, I am absolutely different and I prioritize other things. I value quality time and I follow my dreams. I discovered, and still discovering, with who I can count with and who I just can't. Some people will always project themselves and their lives on you "yeah it was the same with me", "oh no, don't do it, come on why should you do it? (about following a dream)".

Well, that's what I believe: even the most insane, crazy or whatever dream you have, if it ressonates with your soul, you better go for it! Really, go for it! I did it... some people didn't understand because it doesn't make sense in their minds. But guess what.... eventually dreams make sense in the heart, not necessarily in the mind at the first sight and not in other people's minds for sure. That why is called MY dream and not YOUR dream. So, seriously, do you have a dream inside the drawer? People around and your friends don't like it? That's their problem... are you harming someone? I guess you are not. The only person you will harm if you don't chase your dream is yourself... don't let yourself die and make yourself happy.

Eventually what happened was that I stop talking about my dream with some friends to realize the ones who were supporting me and giving unconditional love and loving me for what I am and what I want.

 They are the friends I want to keep. And believe me, my dream is only mine. None of them wanted this dream. They just sat and said "ok, go for it" and stand beside me. That's priceless!

They empowered me instead of putting me down.

My flatmate - she is the best ever (and she doesn't know I have a blog and I'm writing about her ehehehe).

Life goes smoothly living with her. There is not even a single sign of headache here, just respect for each other's private space, companionship, friendship and a fabulous harmonious life at home where support at the end of the day is present. I couldn't have better flatmate. I am so grateful I moved 1 year ago!

Dance - always! Dancing as my life, my air, my soul.

Me and my friend/dancer Cris Aysel, made it possible again and we sucessfully had a fantastic festival - East Fest Lisbon Portugal 2013. Oriental dance is getting better and better every year in my country and I am happy I/we can contribute for it every year with the festival. Organizing, teaching, dancing in 3 days is a chaos but a beautiful and fullfilling chaos! Amazing instructors, artists, special guests but above all beautiful people I've met and made my heart full. My performances were quite special for me. I chose particular songs which lyrics I knew and danced with all my heart and soul. Some people felt goosebumps with one of my performances, others almost cried, it was indeed very special and it blew up my heart - to know I am touching other's heart and people can feel what I felt while dancing. Some people personally told me their impressions of it and everything is just so warming and heartfully.... <3 nbsp="" p="">

GRATEFUL. Always.

Grateful as well for my intuition and for all the signs and messages the Divine has been giving me. I am terrible blessed and I am so much grateful for that.
When I less expect a message comes to hold my heart and give me strenght. It is difficult sometimes to deal with my anxiety when I know something really GOOD is in its way but it is a lesson I have to learn, to wait for the right moment/time and honestly, I wouldn't change it for anything. Having faith sometimes is to believe when everything seems unknown. So, here I am. Believing, keeping the faith. Not giving up and trusting.

Happy and trilled for seeing all my friends with babies or pregnants coming to see me in the oriental dance festival. Happy for their beautiful babies that come to the world to bless us with their light and happy to see beautiful families being built based in unconditional love. I'm proud of being your friend and I'm in absolutely joy of seeing such beautiful life projects! I love you ALL <3 comment-3--="">

Absent from the blogsphere for long due intense work, rythm, changes and decisions.

Today I bring some pearls which touched me...

"Quitters never win, winners never quit"

I hope it will inspire you throughout your day as it inspired me and profoundly touched my soul.

Something to remember everyday....

by Laura Silva.

"It's okay to have another cookie, wake up just
a little late, or even skip an exercise
session or two.

But don't ever, ever, EVER...

Question your own abilities.

Let me remind you of the 6 steps to a better you:

============================================
1. Exercise: I also call it getting your heart beat up.
Make sure in the morning you do at least 30 minutes that
pumps you up and makes you feel awake from the inside.

2. Commit to something you think you can't: pick one thing,
only one, which might give a small result but take one thing

3. Imagine you talking to Patrick about it, tell Patrick why you
can't do it. Sit right next to him and have a conversation
with him. Listen to his answers.

4. Visualize your Outcomes: Build an image on your mental
screen of how you would achieve what you desire

5. Take Action: If it is about changing your job, pick your
computer and make that CV. If its relationship, take your
partner out for dinner and talk it out. Start small but START.

6. Celebrate the results: As you would see you would already
start achieving. Now go out and CELEBRATE. It is important,
you have to go out and cherish every second of it."





This message from Laura Silva, the founder of the Silva method, made a special sense to me... I just put in BOLD so the message would get clear, for me and for you! Lately, I 've been questioning my own abilities and believe me - it's not good! Going deep down in not trusting yourself and trusting others instead, believe me, I've been there and it's the WORSE mistake we can make. Anyway... we learn from mistakes, they say, and it's true... I decided to let go, whatever the others say. Even though I wasn't so into what others think sometimes we let people (who we thought to be our friends) speak.
Lately I don't even give space anymore for others (supposed friends once again) to tell me their opinion or know things about me because I realized... most of the people will talk based on their stories, their believes and will not give you a "supportive" word to you in a not judgemental way (unfortunatelly)... they will tell you THEIR story and not yours... so keep away from negativity and follow the 6 steps as I do the same!

Enjoy the ride and listen to your heart... and when it gets noisy (oh, it's so noisy lately...), close your ears, take a deep breathe and smile! You are the master of your own life, nobody else.
Everything will be okay. TRUST.

As one of the most brilliant portuguese authors said once,
We could live without someone, somehow, we could live
but I don't know how.

I can live without you as you can live without me,
somehow,
but I don't know how...

The most heard question directed to me these last days....

"Why are you fasting?"

- Exactly for all the reasons why Muslims are fasting during the Ramadan.
Despite not being a Muslim, fasting is not mandatory to me, though I choose to do it for all the spiritual reasons associated to it!

* To remember those who don't have any (those who are starving)
* To connect with the Source/God/Universe/Yourself
* Control your mind and free yourself from useless thoughts
* Worship 
* Pratice good deeds

Ramadan is for everybody who feels like doing and celebrating it.
It's time to spend with yourself/God and your loved ones and be together to celebrate life and love as God's blessing. This is my way of living Ramadan... and I love it!

 

Second day of Ramadan but still on time to wish you all a blessed Ramadan. 

May God bless our hearts with love and strenght, regardless our religion, nationality or color!

God is ONE only and love us all.

Bellydance class!

For those who don't know Lorna of Cairo, believe me, you are missing a lot! I decided to book 2h private class with her in Cairo 1 month ago to improve my dance skills and I just can say: 2h is not enough!

If you want to see oriental dance from another perspective, if you want to feel it, enjoy it with all your guts then this is for YOU!

Besides being an amazing person, as a teacher she will blow your mind and light up your thoughts about dance!

The words are just not enough to express how AMAZING my 2h class was... so full of joy and a-ha moments! 

After you catch all the information given you realize you are a new dancer!

Mood of the past days...

Just got better today...  I guess some friends energy was required to make me see so many things - real friends! Thank you to them! (Because they know who they ARE, indeed!)